What all can you stick up there besides a dick? Ultimate-adult-sex-toys offers a dazzling array of insertables. The Anal Balloon Pump combines the virtues of being small when you insert it and big when it’s inside (five times its uninflated size). Jelly Vibrating Anal Beads make for a special sensation with a whole lot of shaking going on. There are also various other jelly dildos and vibrators.

If prostate massage turns you on, maybe you’d like a medium-size ribbed Anal Invader with a multi-speed vibrator that will leave you all shook up to just the right degree. There is also a curved dildo that is claimed to be perfect for finding your G-spot.

If you’re very particular about your vibrator, the Beyond 2000 HS III Vibe promises “over 100 combinations of pulsing, rotating, vibrating, and spinning pleasures.” Presumably it’s like being fucked by a guy who can spin his dick all the way around.

Whatever anal adventure turns you on, when it’s time to bring it to a close, remember the rule: Easy In, Easy Out. Whatever shouldn’t be inserted in haste should also not be removed in haste. That also applies to your dick, however much you may be inclined to think, “I shot my wad and I’m out of here." Clear communication is key.